


Shounen Speeches to the Rescue

by ThreeHats



Category: Tengen Toppa Gurren Lagann, World Wrestling Entertainment
Genre: Crack, Crossover, Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-08-08
Updated: 2016-08-08
Packaged: 2018-08-07 08:43:15
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,092
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7708474
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ThreeHats/pseuds/ThreeHats
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Seth Rollins is breaking under the high pressure of his job as a professional wrestler.  The WWE responds by assigning him someone that he least suspects...</p><p>All characters, locations and scenarios were pulled out of a hat to create this story, which was written in 30 minutes or less.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Shounen Speeches to the Rescue

**Characters:** Kamina (Rayshio Tile), Seth Rollins  
 **Location:** Somewhere in California  
 **Scenario:** Getting yelled at by their boss, somewhere in CA (Abby Krug)

 

All characters, locations and scenarios were pulled out of a hat to create this story, which was written in 30 minutes or less.

\--

SOMEWHERE IN CALIFORNIA...

Seth Rollins wasn’t a bad guy, but he had to play one, and it was starting to get to him. Sitting down hearing an earful from his boss about how he can’t break character during a match was hard to stomach. Dean Ambrose had really gotten hurt in that last match, and they had been friends for a long time. It was only human of him to rush to his side to make sure he was ok. It’s not his fault he choked up when the paramedics came in and he had to go out unconscious on a stretcher. He hadn’t seen a head wound like that that wasn’t from the banned razorblade technique, which is obviously a cause of concern. He knows he’s supposed to be playing up being a heel at the moment, but his friend was hurt, so sue him. 

The words from his superior were going in one ear and out the other. He was aware of what he did wrong and how he needs to keep it together even in the face of a serious injury, but what more could he ask of him? He’s only human. This wasn’t a scripted event, and he figured the lecture was more of a necessity than actual concern. Someone was likely giving them pressure for showing human emotion, which the crowd is normally ok with, but for whatever reason they weren’t that night. In all fairness, Seth had been written as a pretty harsh character in the months leading up to this match. 

“Are we done here?” Seth asked as he pulled his eyes from the ground for just long enough to make eye contact with the form in front of him. “I don’t know, are we?” the authoritarian figure asked. Just as the emotions were about to boil over, two solid raps on the door told the two men that someone was going to enter whether or not they allowed. “What.” his boss yelled at the door. With a surprising gust of wind a shirtless man in a red cape entered with a grand flourish of the excessive material wrapped around his shoulders. His orange sunglasses jutted out either side of his face with brilliantly bright blue hair styled perfectly to partially cover one eye. 

“Kamina” the authority said in a bland but welcoming tone. “Who’s this guy?” Seth asked flatly but with obvious confusion. “He’s your new tag team partner” the tired figure answered as they leaned back in the office chair behind the desk. “I thought we moved me to being more of a solo type guy?” Seth snapped back, with obvious anger at having to hurt his former teammate because of the decision. “Well the company has decided that you’re not holding enough appeal, especially with the most recent...situation” he waved a hand as Seth squirmed as if to start saying something. “Thanks to a now fired social media intern putting out a stupid poll on the internet who GUARANTEED we would match you up in the ‘ultimate fantasy tag team’, we have no choice but to add this guy. Be glad Hitler came in second.” Seth sat back, wondering how long it would be before he’d have to turn against this guy too. 

“You’re...this can’t be real. This guy can’t be real” Seth said in disbelief. “If I may…” Kamina chimed in, and the authority gestured him to continue. Kamina turned to Seth and slammed his hands down on either side of Seth, yelling “Who the hell do you think I am?!” “Seth, surprised at the needless amount of force responded “I honestly have no idea”. “I am the one who can do the impossible, SEE the INVISIBLE” he began in shonen speech style. “You want to fight Cena?” Seth asked confused. “You have to go beyond the impossible and kick reason to the curb! Your drill is the drill that will pierce the Heavens! You can touch the untouchable, break the unbreakable! You have to beLIEVE. BELIEVE IN THE ME THAT BELIEVES IN YOU!” Kamina said dramatically as he took on various heroic poses. 

The authority and Seth both looked on in wide-eyed wonder at the red-eyed smiling figure that had pumped his fist into the air as if his speech had somehow secured him a victory. A few, long moments pass before the authority slowly adds in, “I think….what Kamina is...trying? To say....I think...is that we know you want to be the best Seth, and we want to help get you there, even Kamina, but you have to keep to the script. No matter how insane it gets and no matter where we go from here, even if things get gruesome, we need you to gain your composure when you’re out there. That audience out there are your biggest fans and your greatest enemies at the same time, and your personal opinions and emotions can only show up when people are expecting it. Seth lowered his eyes to the ground before looking at Kamina. “I’m only human man.” Kamina clasped a hand on Seth’s back. “Maybe we don’t have to be the heros or villains people expect us to be,” the authority piped up “Now wait” but Kamina continued, “maybe we can fight the powers that be to make something better, and bridge the gap between absolute good and evil that people knew in the past. Teach them that sometimes life is more complex than that.” Kamina looked at the authority with an intensity that had him break. “We’re already doing that, but we’ll try to work on it. Either way you gotta be able to hold it together better Seth.” Seth’s initial smile at the prospect of change faded a bit, but Kamina chimed in, “Sometimes, you gotta take the blazing sun in your bare hands and endure the searing heat. You gotta be a mans man sustained by strength of will.” He said as put a hand out to indicate that he was going to stick it out to the bitter end, whatever that meant for the both of them. Knowing that he was now paired with this guy regardless of his opinion, he took the hand and met his gaze, sighing out “Let’s get to work”


End file.
